Letters from Pegasus, a Stargate Atlantis text review: Phantoms

Rodney is mistaken for a terrorist, seeing as he’s the guy who told the next door neighbours how to build nukes, blew up the functional part of a solar system and almost ripped a hole in the fabric of two universii I can’t see where anyone would get that impression.

Teaser:

Major Leonard (y’know, major Leonard. he’s been here the whole time) and his team have gone missing on a radioactive planet, sheppard jumps at the chance to irradiate his nuts even more (my working theory is that he really doesn’t like nor want kids) and brings a squad of redshits to help him search for them. then: gate graphic, because we’re running short. then they find some desiccated genii who committed ritualistic, and by ritualistic I mean anarchic, suicide.

The Episode:

ronan starts getting twitchy, seeing imaginary wraith horse illusions but they make it to the cave set without incident. in it is a bad juju wraith device and more dead genii. rodney decides to poke at it because it’s probably why the radiation is blocking radio and unless there’s another one to find probably the suicide syndrome as well. then they find some of major Leonard’s redshirts dead. shep decides to go back to the gate and bring a bigger army, because a whole regiment of crazy is way better than 12 looney men, but the DHD’s booby trapped and Leonard the sane shows up to kill off redshits. he’s driven off but… pegasus gates have no moving parts so the lanteans yet again screw over our heroes. seeing as the gateships are in the wash (and so are the earclip radios) they have to turn off the thing in the cave, apparently… y’know the “if we don’t we’ll go insane and kill each other” point was never brought up, sheppard is doing some really stupid shit this episode and I can’t help but think this wasn’t a deliberate action on the writer’s part.

so shepsquad holes up and rodney sets to work sciencing the thing while carson sets the work patching up the redshirts. then ronan runs of into the woods to shoot at Leonard, shep and teylaa run off after him, ronan fails to hit him and runs around shooting at trees while sheppard stats thinking that teylaa is a man and teylaa starts thinking that that massive pain in her leg may be because leonard shot her. carson starts hallucinating about whether the two remaining redshirts are alive or dead (for the record the dead guy was alive and the living guy dead all along) and rodney starts thinking that he’s saner than he is. meanwhile sisko builds a clock, crighton shoots the crackers, sulu runs around shirtless with a rapier, weir thinks that UAVs will work on a radio-blocked planet, data gets pussy (and it’s not spot) and Hercules kills his wife and kids. shep finds leonard’s magic castle of log tent and holes up with teylaa, then leonard shows up and kamikazes on invisible stormtroopers and sheppard starts thinking he’s back in the war saving man!teylaa from the taliban. he shoots ronan in the arm and rodney in the chest but teylaa convinces him to pull the plug on the cave thing by using generic enough terms to get through his perception filter. the day is saved and the deadalus will come along to pick them up I guess, also shep didn’t save man!teylaa when he was real.

Sora’s Log:

thanks to the recent loss of the ancestor power supply I’ve just spent the last moon reorganizing the earthan ‘nakwada generator’ grid and hooking it into this that and the other, I plug in the long range scanners and the transport booth network goes offline, I get that back in and the lights go out, it’s a delicate and frustrating balancing act that has lead to me learning many earthan curse words from the techs with me and having the chance to try them out. just this morning we lost the gateroom hangar doors to the fire suppressant cooling system while Colonel John’s team was on a mission. you’d think that with so many people that we’ve exhausted the earthan ear communicator supply working on this it’d be easy but no. that earthan stargate bridge thing project back to their homeworld and more supplies can’t be completed soon enough if you ask me.

Final thoughts:

it’s ok i guess, but it could be easily recreated by watching Crackers don’t Matter, or Naked Time, or SG-1 Legacey, or irresistible. the point being that there are much better insane people stories than this.

Cracker’s don’t Matter is where ben browder’s hamminess is. it is Glorious! a must watch even.

now why wasn’t this where CamMitchel learned how to swordfight?

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